What is its exact opposite? Write that down.
Figure out a logical reason for your character to want both things equally as much.
Come up with some other conflicting things your protagoniist wants.
*sigh* This is the classic love-hate, approach-avoidance concept. I had that nailed down with Paul and his attitudes toward being in the Death-Eaters. But I also have some elements in Micaul which can be used for Avriet.
I slept until 10am--bad me!
Dream, the morning of November 25, 2005: Paul Betancourt, the guy who played Maturin in Master and Commander, is doing a sort of Peter Woodward thing by teaching some children of around age 12 or so to fight with pretend daggers and knives, as if they were child actors in a movie. He stands on a stage and has the children watching. Then he calls one boy forward to help him demonstrate the moves to everyone else before they try the moves on their own. Betancourt has a spear that he uses to gesture and point with for emphasis. That's about all I remember.
Thanksgiving: Thanksgiving was quite nice. Since my sister-in-law Janet was having her husband's family over as well as us, she was serving ham and brisket as well as turkey, with stuffing, broccoli, green beans, sweet potatoes, macaroni and cheese, cranberry sauce, rice, and rolls. Dessert was a choice among lemon meringue, apple, pumpkin, and pecan pies, chocolate cake, or strawberry cheesecake.
I think I was a relatively good girl and did not stuff myself, thank goodness. Er, well, I did stuff myself on broccoli. (g)